Lehigh Football Nation

Coach Andy Coen at football practice (Morning Call) Lehigh's spring session has been underway for several weeks now - the period of time where Patriot League championships are won. It's a spring season where, frankly, there's not that much drama, especially on offense. There's no drama at quarterback, where senior QB Nick Shafnisky is firmly ensconced as the starter, and proven sophomore QB Brad Mayes right there next to him on the depth chart. It's very clear that sophomore RB Dominic Bragalone will be a big part of next year's offense, health willing, as well as junior WR Troy Pelletier and a many players from last year's offense that led the Patriot League in total offensive yardage. So what is the big story halfway through the spring? Whether there will be enough healthy bodies to have a spring game.

I love the NCAA tournament, usually. I play in the office pool, but more than just that, I emotionally get involved with the games.  Yes, that's not an exaggeration.   Emotionally involved.  I stand up and yell at the TV set for teams located in places I've never visited, becoming hoarse for schools I didn't attend, cheering for Cinderellas I didn't know existed a month before. Like most of America, I have fallen in love with the underdog narrative - the plucky, underdog story we've all seen in Hoosiers and Little Giants and countless good, bad, and terrible sports movies over the last fifty years. And as a fan of my alma mater, Lehigh, I guess I live this underdog story on a near-daily basis.  Lehigh is almost always the "smaller school" in all their NCAA athletics contests, whether it's wrestlers going against the semi-pros of Penn State and Iowa, or the football team going against the 100+ scholarshipped players of Yale or Princeton. Th...

For the last few years, "the commitee" and I have compiled the Patsy Ratings, an attempt to evaluate the incoming football classes of the Patriot League. It's clearly "for entertainment purposes only," an effort to try to take a look at whether a schools' recruiting needs are met, whether they've secured the playing services of a lot of recognized talent, and whether some of their measurables look good. However, I frequently find myself wanting the Patsy Ratings to do more.  For example, how did the Patriot League as a whole do in comparison to other FCS schools?  Did the Mountain Hawks crush their FCS competition?  Or was the actual picture different? Without, say, an equivalent James Madison Football Nation willing to make these Patsy-like evaluations of the incoming classes of other FCS schools, there was no real good way to make that type of comparison. However, my curiosity got the better of me.   "There must be a way," ...

The Committee member popped the DVD in the player once again.  "The Top 25 Moments in Murray Goodman history." "What'cha doin'?", another Committee member said. "In a way, I hate this time of year," she said.  "With the Patsy Ratings done, all we have left to get us through the offseason are all these videos.  Sure, there's spring football, of course, but fall always feels so far away in March." "Is that a VHS copy of Colgate beating Florida Atlantic in 2003?  Didn't Howard Schnellenberger order that all surviving copies of that game be destroyed?" "That was a heck of a find," she said.  "Apparently they were cleaning up some house in Ithaca and the kids were going to throw out an old shopping bag filled with videos.  Incredibly, they found it, along with rare footage of Cornell playing a competitive game with Colgate." "Do we have any Yuenglings in the fridge?" ...

"Come over here," one Committee member said. She ran to the door, and saw a basket with two spotted creatures.  She couldn't help but stifle an "Aw!" as, for a moment, her heart, hardened by hours or work on the Patsy ratings, melted. "Oh great," another Committee member said.  "More strays.  Should we print out more flyers to see who might adopt them?" "More worryingly," another Member said, "is this an attempt to try to impugn the sanctity of the Patsy Ratings?  Could this be an attempt to bribe the Committee by offering them some cute Leopard cubs?" The Committee  member looked back at the Member quizzically.  "Since when did the Patsy Ratings have sanctitiy?" they asked seriously. "Look, they're playing!" she said.

"Pass me some more Buffalo wings," one Committee member said to another. "You're going to get wing sauce all over these folders," another said.  "Buffalo wings and Patsy point calculation don't exactly go together." "Don't judge me," the member said, a bit more sourly this time.  "I just work differently than you.  I need protein when I compute the Patsies.  Just because you're a Vegan don't tell me how to do things." "I'm not judging," the Vegan member said, munching on her kale chips.  "I'm simply saying not everyone likes to smell Buffalo wing sauce permeating the folders.  That's something I think we all can agree on. "Mmmph," was all the other red-eyed Committee member could muster, his mouth full of Buffalo wings, blue cheese sauce, and celery. The Vegan looked quzzically, until she saw a third member holding up a half-empty bottle of "Third Street C...

The office seemed a lot lighter than it once was.  A committee member looked around, and saw the regular piles of computer printouts, spilled fax ink, and opened folders.  Only a radio blaring Extreme's "More than Words" could be heard. "Where are they," he wondered?  "This had better not be another audit." Looking outside, he saw the Committee members outside.  There was a new food truck there.  Curious, he went out to see. "I'll have a three-pack of fish tacos with crema," he asked the food truck operator. He enjoyed the tacos and stopped in the men's room to check his teeth.  Green things in there.  Good thing he remembered to bring his toothbrush. "That reminds me," he thought.