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Fiction: I-A Announces Playoff and Bowl Pairings

Dateline: Kansas City, Missouri. The NCAA made an an official announcement regarding the second straight year of shafting a deserving team for playing for the national championship.

"We are deeply saddened that a terrible, rigged BCS system has prevented 3 deserving undefeated teams to play of the national championship.

"But rather than apologize for an antiquated, rigged system of determining a I-A champion, we've decided to make a bold, visionary decision that will piss off virtually everybody in power, but instead make sportswriters, coaches, and current and former players cheer. We have decided, in our power as the governing body of the NCAA, to institute a playoff system modelled after I-AA.

"Since the inception of the I-AA playoffs, we have watched from afar while I-AA has produced thrilling games, great competition, and an undisputed national champion. We admire their style of football, even if we don't shower them with nearly as much money and recognition as they deserve, and we thought it would be a great way to bail ourselves out of the BCS mess we've put ourselves into these past seven years. It's our way of saying "thanks", and rest assured that all I-AA schools will from now on will receive a cut of the national championship game money pot, as they should have been all along.

"We have talked to all the bowl game directors. With lots of arm-twisting and legal wrangling, they agreed to be a part of this system that will create unprecedented interest in I-A football, a billion-dollar television contract, and Nielsen rating through the roof, not to mention packed stadiums.

"It did cause some teams to be squeezed out of bowls to which they were previously committed. To compensate them for their pain and suffering, we decided to make a one-time payment of $250,000 per school, which will be paid for by the first six ad spots paid by sponsors during the Orange Bowl. Although, if you're 6-5 and not named Notre Dame or UCLA, you have no business being in the postseason anyway, so take your quarter million and be quiet.

"Without any further ado, here are the seedings and pairings:

1st Round Bowls (all times Eastern):
December 15th
Continental Tire Bowl, Charlotte, NC, 3:00PM
Georgia (9-2) vs. #4 Seed Virginia Tech (10-2)
Insight Bowl, Phoenix, AZ, 8:00PM
Miami (Fl) (8-3) vs. California (10-1)
December 16th
Outback Bowl, Tampa, FL, 3:00PM
Pittsburgh (8-3) vs. Iowa (9-2)
Alamo Bowl, San Antonio, TX, 8:00PM
Boise St. (11-0) vs. #1 Seed USC (12-0)
December 17th
Peach Bowl, Atlanta, GA, 3:00PM
Michigan (9-2) vs. Texas (10-1)
Sun Bowl, El Paso, TX, 8:00PM
Louisiana State (9-2) vs. #3 Seed Oklahoma (12-0)
December 18th
Liberty Bowl, Memphis, TN, 3:00PM
Tenessee (9-3) vs. Louisville (10-1)
Holiday Bowl, San Diego, CA, 8:00PM
Utah (11-0) vs. #2 Seed Auburn (11-0)

"Here are the new remaining bowl matchups. The only bowl that needed to be rescheduled was the Hawaii Bowl (to December 31st), so it won't interfere with the second round of the playoffs:

Remaining Bowls (* indicates new team):
New Orleans, New Orleans, LA, Memphis* (8-3) vs. North Texas (7-4)
Champs Sports, Orlando, FL, Boston College* (8-3) vs. Florida* (7-4)
GMAC, Mobile, AL, Bowling Green (8-3) vs. Notre Dame* (6-5)
Fort Worth, Fort Worth, TX, Purdue* (7-4) vs. Oklahoma St.* (7-4)
Las Vegas, Las Vegas, NV, UCLA (6-5) vs. Colorado* (7-5)
MPC Computers, Boise, ID, Virginia (8-3) vs. Fresno St. (8-3)
Motor City, Detroit, MI, UConn (7-4) vs. Toledo (8-3)
Independence, Shreveport, LA, Texas Tech* (7-4) vs. Florida* (7-4)
Silicon Valley, San Jose, CA, West Virgina* (8-3) vs. Ohio St.* (7-4)
Emerald, San Francisco, CA, Northern Illinois* (8-3) vs. Navy (8-2)
Houston, Houston, TX, UTEP (8-3) vs. Texas A&M* (7-4)
Music City, Nashville, TN, Florida St* (8-3) vs. Wisconsin* (9-2)
Hawaii, Honolulu, HI, Hawaii (7-5) vs. Arizona St.* (8-3)

"Lehigh Football Nation, that great unbiased bastion of online I-AA football coverage, will be the official outlet for the results of this years' I-A playoffs. Any questions or comments can be directed there."

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